The Old Ways
by andAshes
Summary: Without Merlin around, life was unbearably dull. So he does the only thing to do - goes looking for him. And somewhere along the way, he notices what's been there all along. They really were two sides of the same coin. Arthur/Merlin
1. I

__I don't own Merlin. Lyrics are from various Loreena Mckennitt songs. I don't own the poetry or the lyrics, whichever they happen to be in each chapter.

I struggled to write from Arthur's point of view. But for the purposes of the story, I had to. There are some lines I want to use, but they just don't work with the story. Perhaps I will write a sequel, just so I can use them. This is a three-part story. Enjoy. I don't own Merlin, of course.

* * *

_Somewhere the sun rose, o'er dunes in the desert__  
__such was the stillness, I ne'er felt before__  
__Was this the question, pulling, pulling, pulling you__  
__in your heart, in your soul, did you find rest there?_

Merlin had been gone for exactly two days and thirteen hours. It was late afternoon, he was tired. He hadn't been able to get a good night's rest in two days. Which was rather unusual for him, never once in his life had he had troubles with sleep. Maybe it had something to do with the fact that he was mind-numbingly _bored_. Was it possible to be too bored to sleep? Had Prince Arthur really got to this point? He actually needed his manservant to keep him occupied throughout the day? Did he rely on him that much?

Merlin. Off visiting his mother, making sure that the dragon hadn't destroyed his hometown. He suspected other reasons as well, Merlin had been carrying a half haunted expression lately. As if something was troubling him. Why had he let him go anyways? Normally, servants didn't take time off, unless it was a rare occasion. A death in the family or something of the sort would have been a passable reason. Gwen had taken a few days to collect herself after her father had been executed. So it happened, but there had been no deaths in Merlin's family, so why would he need to leave? If he had known how insufferably bored he was going to be without his dim-witted manservant, he probably wouldn't have let him go in the first place.

Not even training could rid his boredom. He dressed himself in his armour, wondering if he actually missed Merlin's awkward fingers tying the strings. It gave him the slightest bit of amusement to watch him fumble. Especially if it was cold out and the metal was chill to the touch. As Arthur continued about his day, he eventually found himself lying in bed. Wide awake, staring at the ceiling, lost in thought.

The night broke into a cold morning, and half that time he had been rolling about in his bed, his vain attempts to get comfortable wasted by the fact that every time he closed his eyes, he imagined another long and boring day. Without Merlin.

There was a knock at the door, and he called them in. A servant, carrying a tray of food, entered, setting it down on the table wordlessly. "Would you gather me enough food and supplies to last a few days?" He requested, sitting up in his bed slowly.

"Yes sire" She responded, exiting the room to allow him to get dressed. He didn't let any other servants dress him, not when he was perfectly capable of dressing himself. He wasn't sure why. Before Merlin had arrived, other servants took care of such tasks.

By the time she came back, Arthur was dressed and standing at the window. Staring out over the village, he admired the work done to repair buildings. They had been lucky. The dragon's attack had not killed everyone. Only some, and though their loss wasn't insignificant, he knew it could have been worse.

He dismissed the servant, inspecting the food she had brought. It should be enough, and a reasonable gift for showing up unannounced. He was tired, and sat down in the chair for a long moment. Gathering his thoughts and taking a moment to ponder the dragon.

Arthur did not remember killing it. He remembered getting hit, and when he woke up Merlin's dopey grin told him he had slain it. There was no body, his sword contained no blood. If he had not done it, who had? There was no way Merlin could have done it. Unless, well, strange things happened when he was with Merlin, perhaps he had something to do with it. The idea seemed impossible, what could _Merlin_ do that could destroy a dragon? He had not failed to notice spears launching themselves at enemies with no one claiming they had thrown it. Rooftops caving in at random, tree branches throwing themselves off of the rest of the tree. Strange things that he couldn't explain, and even less did he want to wonder what the explanation was. Somehow, he didn't think he would like the answer.

He supposed that he could just ask for a sleeping draught from Gaius. But surely he would ask him 'why', and that was a difficult question to answer. Telling him that he was bored because Merlin wasn't around, and therefore couldn't sleep seemed almost suspicious. Even though in his mind, it didn't seem that way.

Arthur made his way to the stables, gathering his horse and strapping his things to him. He spotted Gwen walking with a basket of blankets in her hands. He rushed out to her. "Could you give word to my father that I will be going out on a little hunting trip? I should be back in a few days." He asked, the woman nodded with a pale smile.

"Of course, sire, I'll let him know right away. And.. be safe."

He nodded, his lips curled into a pleasant smile. "I will. See you in a few days."

Just like that – he was off. Arthur knew the way to Ealdor, it would take some time, but he would be there soon enough.

* * *

Even though Arthur was lacking the proper amount of sleep, he still made fast work of the distance. Stopping for only a few hours once the chill of the night set in to sleep, even though he was only able to sleep for an hour or so at the most.

By the time he arrived in Ealdor he was feeling strained and hungry. But the village looked happy to see him; those who remembered him bowed their heads respectfully. Arthur nodded slightly in return, his eyes concentrated on finding the reason he came all this way. It didn't really take that long to find the boy, he was bent over a fire, adding a couple sticks to the flames. There was a pot of water boiling over it, even though the fire seemed far too small to boil that much of it so quickly.

Arthur dismounted the horse, looping the reins over a fence post, dusting off his hands and walking towards his manservant. Merlin's messy hair seemed even messier than usual as he crossed his arms over his chest, waiting to be noticed.

It didn't take long for Merlin to cast his eyes over his shoulder, then jump, letting out an "Arthur!" as he straightened.

"Good job Merlin, it only took you two minutes to notice me."

Suddenly the boy looked flustered, a brief shine of panic in his eyes. "I'm not doing anything" He said quickly. "Wait, what are you doing here?" He raised an eyebrow, watching him carefully.

"Relax, I'm just here to make sure you don't go and get your head lopped off." He stated breezily.

Merlin seemed to relax a bit, enough to pull that cheeky grin of his and teasingly start speaking. "Missed me already? Or did you forget how to tie your own boots?"

"Hardly. You're barely capable of that, much less surviving alone out here."

"You know I grew up here, right?" That smile never left his face.

Arthur simply clapped Merlin's shoulder, retreating to the horse to pull off the bag of food he had brought. "I'll be staying here awhile" He declared. "This should help." He tossed it at the boy, who fumbled with the heavy sack before securing his grip.

"But, why-?" Arthur gave him a clear 'don't ask, or you'll regret it' look, which shut him up nicely.

* * *

Merlin prepared a nice dinner, using some of what Arthur had brought. He set up a place in his room for Arthur to sleep, and Arthur was sure not to ask Merlin to do any minor tasks. He even helped fetch water and offered the food he had brought with him from Camelot. He could tell Merlin had a thousand questions for him, just by glancing at him.

These were questions that didn't really seem to have any real answers right now. Merlin went to visit his mother, sure, he was his servant, but did that mean that he had to command him right now? Maybe he had left partly to get away from him – and here he was. Following him all the way to his hometown didn't seem entirely logical. But he had done it, he was here now, so what could they do about it?

Until the time came for him to answer these questions, Arthur didn't have anything to say. He had shown up unannounced; it went against everything he knew to demand them to wait on him at every step. The last time he had been here he had been there to help, he had been younger, and he knew less than he did now. He had aged a lot since Merlin had started working for him.

The evening passed quickly, Merlin was back to his usual irritating self. They bickered aimlessly, calling one another names. There was no one else he would tolerate calling him names like this. No one but Merlin, and he had no idea how the boy had managed to get to that point in the first place. He knew it wasn't serious, Merlin was just.. Merlin.

He lay on the hard ground, staring upwards. He was tired; there was no doubt about that. The lack of sleep had been gnawing at his head all day; Merlin was settled beside him, lying with his feet near his head. He placed his hands behind his head, glancing down the blankets at Merlin's body. "Okay. You can talk now." He stated smugly, aware that those questions were burning away in his mind.

"Why _are_ you here?"

"I was bored." He admitted. "You wouldn't believe how stuffy everyone is, without your blundering around I have no one to talk to." He could tell Merlin was smiling.

"So you did miss me" He said smugly, Arthur nudged him with his toes playfully.

"Not entirely. It's nice to get out of Camelot sometimes."

"But you came to find me."

"I already told you, I was bored."

He could picture Merlin's expression. He could imagine his eyes would be scrunched up because he was grinning like an idiot. He could see his high cheekbones in the light and the way his hair needed a trim. Merlin's face seemed to be engraved into his mind, and he inhaled thickly. Breathing in the smell of the dust of the ground and the smell of Merlin's sheets, almost happily.

Merlin didn't say anything else, but he had a feeling there was something else on his mind. There was a vague tension in the air around them – but Merlin remained completely quiet. Arthur opened his mouth to speak, but hesitated before he could say anything.

The next thing Arthur knew, it was late in the morning and Merlin was gone. He relaxed, leaning back into the ground and smiling to himself. Merlin had hung one of his shirts over the curtain-less window so that he would be able to sleep in a bit longer. For the first time since Merlin had left, Arthur felt completely rested. He lay there for a few long moments, wondering why he felt so happy and why on earth it appeared that Merlin was the one to do it. The room was still warm, the chill of the morning lingered but the heat of the day had already begun to warm the air.

When he finally rose, he stretched and made to look for Merlin. Instead, he found his mother. Who smiled fondly and handed him a bowl of porridge, decorated with a few of the fruits that Arthur had brought. "I know it's not much, sire, but I hope you can enjoy it."

"How about Merlin and I head out and catch a nice meal for tonight?"

Merlin didn't seem to mind going out with Arthur, especially because he wasn't asked to dress him or anything of the sort. They were simply two friends going hunting together, enjoying the crisp air. No talk of servants or princes or duties or anything that was required of them, only the air and the subtle kind of friendship they carried. Riding their horses along a path, they travelled far away. Back into his own kingdom, just so they wouldn't run into any trouble. They chatted aimlessly, Merlin didn't have any worries, and eventually they stopped half an hour's distance from a village. Loosely looping their horses to a tree near a small river, they gathered their supplies to finish their journey on foot.

Merlin was clumsy as ever, something Arthur wondered if he would ever improve upon. He supposed it was just another thing that made him Merlin, and not anyone else. Feeling well rested, Arthur felt agile and prepared.

He led the way, whispering hushed commands in attempt to flush out the creatures they were hunting.

Arthur knelt, inspecting something on the ground. Eventually, he plucked a feather off of the hard leafy ground, examining it. It was unlike any other he had ever seen, deep ebony with a peculiar shine to it. He slid the feather into his pocket; this creature had to be close. They could close in on it if they could track it.

Merlin made his way in a half circle, he was just out of sight when he heard a yell. He was up, spear in his hand, rushing towards his friend. A feathered dog-like creature brought its large black claws down on Merlin's shoulder.

It was uneventful to kill it; the creature was already injured and missing parts of its feathers. The spear shot home and it landed heavily on the ground, Merlin shakily stood as he walked over. "Good job, Merlin. You almost got your head lopped off. Good thing I'm here." He stated smugly, about to side step the creature. But it was already gone, just a pile of ash and feathers where it had been laying. He rose an eyebrow as he passed, instead heading over to Merlin to inspect his bloody shoulder.

"I wouldn't be out here if you hadn't dragged me" Merlin stated, his face twisted in pain.

"Come on now, it can't be that bad." Arthur insisted, inspecting the rips in the other's shirt and the scratches under. "See? It's not that bad. Here-" Arthur interrupted himself by ripping a long ribbon of fabric off of his shirt, to which Merlin bit his tongue. He tied it skilfully around the three long scratches, making sure it was tight enough to stop the bleeding. "Let's keep moving." He said as he clapped Merlin on his good shoulder, nudging him onwards.

Until a large growl caused him to stop, placing a hand on his sword. His eyes narrowed, and he saw the boar rush towards them. They were common in these parts, though they weren't often very large. When they were, it was a struggle for even him to defeat one. This one, as it came rushing forwards, was one of the largest he had seen. Sword at ready, he prepared to attack. Both he and Merlin barely dodged as it rushed passed and came back for another charge. Snorting and frothing as it did, staring Arthur down. As it came charging, Arthur threw his sword with all of his strength. The sword only sliced briefly into its back before flying off, landing on the ground somewhere. Panic gripped him, until the spear he had left on the ground flew straight, fast, and well-aimed into the boar's neck.

There it was again. A spear coming out of nowhere like that, saving him in the process. He turned around quickly, turning his gaze to Merlin. Had Merlin been throwing these spears all this time? He didn't know that Merlin was even capable of doing that, but he seemed to be breathing heavily. He looked a little flushed. Calmly, Arthur made his way to the spear and, with some effort, pulled it out.

He tossed it to Merlin, who nearly didn't catch it. "Throw it" He commanded. His first real command since they had seen each other.

Merlin threw it at the boar, it bounced off harmlessly. "So Merlin, why is it that when we're in a battle, you're able to throw spears as if you've grown up doing it, but when I'm actually watching you, you can't throw hard enough to save your life?"

Merlin spluttered, as if he had no idea how to respond. "Er, well, I don't know?" He said, looking at him hopelessly. "Maybe when I know someone's in danger I know what to do with it."

Arthur didn't know what else to say. Sure, he had a suspicion. One that he didn't want to think about, the implications were worse than he could imagine. The words didn't even come to his mind, he simply stood there, then sighed, shaking his head. "Let's get this home." He concluded, getting to work on stripping easily cartable pieces of meat from the carcass.

Merlin helped where he could, he had a basic understanding of it, and eventually just stepped back and let Arthur take care of it. Then the two of them made their way back to their horses. Merlin seemed to be going a little slower than normal, and he stopped and looked back at him. He looked pale, but he just chalked it up to the watery cloudy light that passed through the trees. "What's taking you so long?" He demanded. "Don't tell me you're still blundering about that shoulder."

"No, sire. Sorry," as he rushed forwards to join him, so they could walk beside one another. Arthur slowed his pace enough for Merlin to keep up, wondering what the boy was up to.

When they made it back to their horses, Merlin was looking a bit worse now. "Seriously Merlin, if you're not feeling well then speak up."

"No sire, I'm fine" His voice was quiet, he didn't meet his eyes. Arthur sighed, mounting his horse and waiting for Merlin to do the same. But Merlin had changed, he was no longer babbling on about unimportant things, he was quiet, which bothered Arthur. He had come here to, even though he didn't want to admit it more than he already had, to see Merlin. Not anyone else. So having the boy quiet down bothered him.

That was, until Merlin groaned lowly. By the time Arthur stopped, Merlin was swaying and wound up in the dust, all the colour drained from his face, blood staining his blue shirt.


	2. II

Still love this show. Here's another chapter. I promise the next chapter will have more 'action'.

I've written the last chapter, but I'm not entirely happy with it. So if there's anyone who is interested in taking a look at it for me, and letting me know if I've managed to write it in the same way as the first two, I would be more than happy to share it. I can be reached through PMs, AOL (Just Isn t Mine) or Skype (xLarxene).

I've got a lot of positive feedback pretty much right away. Thank you so much! I love reviews, and I love this series and I love Merlin and Arthur. I spent two days looking through Merlin and Arthur fanfictions, all the while finding very little that I really enjoyed. Please keep reviewing, the final chapter can come at any time, probably as soon as I've convinced myself that the last chapter isn't too illogical. I will be writing a sequel.

One more review and I'll upload the last chapter!

* * *

_And so it's there that my homage's due  
Clutch-ed by the still of the night  
Now I feel, feel you move  
And every breath, breath is full_

Panic gripped him, and he quite nearly threw himself off of his horse, skidding onto his knees to roll Merlin to his back. He had never seen him this pale, as if he had lost a lot of blood. The blood continued to pool around him, a slow stream of it. This wasn't possible, how could he continue bleeding? He had covered the wound.

He tore the cloth from the other's chest, and found the wounds still wide open and leaking. "Merlin" He stated, exasperated. "If you weren't feeling well you should have told me." He was ripping more cloth from his shirt, wadding it up and pressing it hard against the wounds, gathering the boy up in his arms. The village wasn't that far away if they moved fast, there had to be someone who could help him.

Arthur mounted his horse, the reigns of Merlin's horse looped around his wrist, Merlin's back pressed against his chest, his free hand holding the cloth in place. He raced forwards, back towards the village. Merlin struggled to breathe, but he still made noises, he still might have been conscious. That was a good sign, it means that they hadn't run out of it yet.

They reached the town, Arthur tossed himself from the horse, gathering Merlin carefully in his arms. People stared, "I need a physician." He commanded. People were still for a second, before Arthur added "Now! There isn't much time!"

A middle aged woman led him into her home, bottles lined the walls, papers and books were scattered across the desk. She was a lot neater than Gaius, and he set Merlin down on the bed. Explaining what had happened. "Remove his shirt, and fetch me some water. I know what this is. I have dealt with it before." Relief rushed across him, and he carefully slipped the boys shirt off, his eyes widening. The three marks on his chest were gruesome. Perfectly clean and long cuts, they weren't even that deep. What caught his breathe in his chest was just how thin Merlin was. He had never seen his servant without a shirt before, though he knew that he was thin, he did not know he was that thin. It worried him, maybe he would try to make sure Merlin got fed a little better.

Arthur went outside, searching for a moment as to where he would fetch some water. Instead of wasting time, he turned on his heel and entered the room again. What he saw caused him to freeze in place, the woman had her hands over Merlin's injury, her eyes reflecting orange, whispering words he didn't understand.

She halted the spell, looking up at the Prince, who looked livid. "Sire, please, the creature that did this has a poison that we do not have a cure for yet." She said hastily, standing. Arthur was frozen in place, his blood rushed icily through his ears.

"You're preforming magic. How do I know you're not trying to kill my servant?"

"I promise I won't kill him!" She protested, her hands were shaking. "I can help him. I've helped others. He'll die, my Lord, if you don't let me help him." How could he know if she was telling the truth? Magic users were never to be trusted. "The creature is a Kleeia, it's a magical creature that's claws force wounds open. Once the victim dies, the creature will devour what's left."

Arthur was silent. "H-how.." He started. "How can I trust you?" He hissed, arms crossed over his chest, his teeth gritted.

"Please, my Lord, you cannot tell the King about this. The people in this town need me; I'm only here to help them. They will die without my help, and so will he." She nodded to Merlin, her body still trembling; fear was all he could see in her. Fear and honesty. "If you keep this a secret, I will heal him."

Arthur didn't know what to do. Someone was clearly using magic, and had been. This woman could be executed without any questions. She reminded him of Gaius, just doing what she had to in order to help. "He doesn't have much time." She pleaded. Tears were threatening to fall from her eyes, "Please overlook this."

Arthur couldn't let Merlin die. He could barely handle a few days without him, let alone a lifetime. "I give you my word" He started slowly, his eyes fixed on Merlin's strained face. "Your secret is safe."

The woman didn't waste any time, she knelt back beside Merlin and held her hands over his still bleeding wounds. Her words came quickly, her eyes shone gold, the wounds began to seal themselves, a thin chain of dark smoke unfurling from it.

She dropped her hands when the marks were gone, standing. "Let him rest." She said softly, her head bowed. "He will be fine; I'll fetch some water to clean him off."

Arthur's heart was beating in his throat; he went to Merlin's side, hardly aware that he too was covered in red. His breathing seemed to even out, his face relaxed. So she had done it. She had saved Merlin's life with magic. He was relieved, and he could tell the woman was still worried; she came back with a heated bowl of water and placed it on the table beside Merlin. She wet a cloth to begin to wipe his skin free from blood.

Arthur grasped her hand, gently taking the cloth from her. It was partly his fault, he should be the one to do this. "I gave you my word" He repeated, his eyes focused on Merlin's ivory skin. "Your secret is safe. I killed the creature we met in the woods. You and this village may be safe now."

The woman smiled, and slowly rose from her spot, exiting the room without another word. Arthur slowly ran the cloth across Merlin's skin, removing all traces of red. Dipping the cloth frequently into the water so he could continue cleaning, and finally Arthur grabbed Merlin's hands one by one, gently wiping away every last trace of blood.

The water was red by the time he was finished, he sat back on his feet, his knees sore from kneeling on the ground for so long.

Merlin awoke feeling groggy, Arthur wordlessly placed his hand at the back of his neck, pulling him up and bringing water to his lips. "Merlin" He started slowly, lowering his friend back down to the bed after he had wet his mouth. "What are your thoughts on magic?"

"Sire?" Merlin asked weakly, blinking through the headache and the dimly lit room.

"Just answer the question."

"I, uh" Arthur passed his reply up to the blood loss. "I don't know, sire. I'm sure there's.. some good out there."

Merlin looked tired. "Maybe my father's wrong." His voice was barely above a whisper, Merlin's expression was lethargic and unreadable. Arthur stood "Let's go, your mother's bound to be worried."

Merlin nodded, bringing his legs to the edge of the bed. Arthur placed an arm under his, helping him stand. "Can you walk on your own?" He asked.

"What happened?" Merlin asked, his hand fisting into Arthur's shirt tightly to keep him up.

"…" Arthur simply led Merlin outside. "I gave my word not to say." He said softly. Merlin bowed his head.

"I heard." He said. "Not everything. But. Some of it. It was magic, wasn't it?" His voice was quiet, Arthur said nothing. "Thank you, sire."

Merlin rode back to Ealdor resting against his chest, still too weak to sit on his own. It wasn't until evening that they had returned. Merlin's mother rushed over to meet them, Merlin gave her a lazy wave, his strength slowly returning. Especially with Arthur insisting he eat some of the bread he had packed along with them. They climbed off the horse, Arthur slowly explained what had happened as they brought Merlin inside.

He didn't mention anything about magic. A woman had proved herself – magic was not always evil, not like his father told him. A woman used her power to help others, she did not use it to hurt anyone. The prospect of someone she had never met potentially losing his life brought tears into her eyes.

His thoughts were thick, they ate, enjoyed another evening before settling into sleep. Merlin seemed quiet, and Arthur nudged his shoulder with his toes. "Why didn't you tell me you weren't feeling well?" He asked.

"I didn't think it would be that bad." Came the slightly muffled reply.

"There was blood all over your hands, how could you not think it was bad"

"I guess I didn't notice."

"No one's that clueless."

"…" Merlin chuckled slightly, rolling into his back. "I guess it's a good thing you were here." He started. "I wouldn't be here anymore if it wasn't for you."

"You wouldn't have been out there in the first place if it wasn't for me."

They laughed together, Arthur playfully shoved Merlin's knees (the only part of him he could reach with his hands) and let his arm rest across them carelessly. Merlin didn't bother kicking his arm off, he only settled in to sleep. Arthur closed his eyes, wishing Merlin a soft 'goodnight' before slipping into sleep himself.

Merlin was awake and up before him again, his shirt had been cleaned and mended and lay beside him. He frowned, he had not asked Merlin to fix it, and as he inspected the seams he smiled despite himself. Merlin wasn't the best with a needle and thread, but he supposed he got the job done. He sat up and made his way outside. There were birds chirping, Merlin was sitting with his mother, rubbing her shoulder. She looked upset, Merlin was muttering softly to her. Stroking her hair, trying to comfort her in the only way he could. Arthur, respectfully, turned away. Best to leave them alone for now, she was probably worried that he had almost died.

But the two of them had faced near death countless times. Merlin had poisoned himself so that no one else would die. Merlin had put himself in danger. And Arthur had returned the favour. The startling gravity of their situation hit him – when they had been faced with the final test after slaying a unicorn, they had both insisted on drinking the poison. Merlin begged him to let his life be taken, and Arthur insisted that he would rather die than let Merlin perish.

His thoughts caught him off guard, he breathed a bit harder than normal as he walked a little ways away from the village, sitting down on a log and staring hard at the ground in front of him. He didn't hear anyone sneaking up on him, and he certainly didn't hear Merlin gather up a handful of leaves (when did Merlin get so sneaky?). He did, however, feel a large armful of leaves tossed at his head, cascading down his shoulders. He turned, jumping to his feet. There stood Merlin, half grin on his face, bright eyes fixed on him. He gave a cocky little one-shoulder shrug. "Oh that's it" Arthur growled, grabbing a handful of leaves to toss at him. Merlin, seemingly aware that Arthur was going to be chasing him took off through the wooded area. Arthur gathered two handfuls of leaves and easily caught up with him, it really wasn't that hard, or Merlin wasn't trying. He got closer to him and tied an arm around his neck, tackling him to the ground and pressing his handful of leaves to Merlin's face as though he were smothering him.

Merlin was laughing, so was he, even though it took a while to notice that. He was lying on top of Merlin, tossing leaves at him as Merlin did the same. His face seemed to glow with a thrilled amusement, turning his head to the side to keep the leaves from his face. "Ouch – hey, wait!" Merlin eventually gasped through his laughter, arching his back and reaching under his lower back for something. That's when Arthur realized just how on top of the other he was. He tugged the rock out from under him, and tossed it to the side. Arthur rolled off of him, the calm smile still on his face. They lay among the autumn leaves, breathing and occasionally kicking leaves at one another.

Their playing slowed, Arthur placed his hands behind his head, laying maybe a little too close to Merlin for comfort. But he didn't move, that would make everything seem worse than it was. "I could get used to this." He breathed fondly. He didn't like sleeping on the ground, he didn't like having a small selection of food, and he really didn't like how cold it could get in the mornings. He liked riding horses with Merlin, he liked throwing leaves at him and half wrestling in the grass, he liked being away from his usual duties.

"It gets old" Merlin admitted, that large smile was still plastered across his lips. "It's a nice place for a visit every now and then."

"We'll come back here soon." Arthur stated.

"Sire?"

"What, you think you're the only one who could use a vacation?" He playfully pushed the side of Merlin's face, the male swatted at his hand in return, catching it in the air. Arthur didn't waste a second to pull his hand away, scoffing at him.

Arthur's thoughts remained muddled. He wondered if it might be best for him to return to Camelot. But that would mean leaving Merlin behind. Did he really want to do that? The answer was a clear no, even before he was able to properly form the thought, let alone the answer.

He noticed that, even though he didn't have his usual activities going on (tournaments and training and the like) he didn't feel even remotely bored. Even when he was left to his own devices as Merlin helped his mother or left to gather supplies. This place had a rustic beauty that he couldn't deny that he enjoyed it. Merlin proved to be good company, and he was surprisingly willing to help bring home a meal every night.

Arthur was older and wiser, he had grown a lot in these last months. Merlin had helped him through that; there was no one who could deny it. Was it strange to be so ready to risk his life for a servant? Maybe he was looking into it too much; wouldn't he do the same for any of his other friends? Arthur couldn't place why his thoughts had turned into mud.

Merlin strode over to him, carrying a bowl full of strawberries. Arthur didn't even have a second thought about the two of them sharing them as they sat on the hill facing the sunset. In Camelot, it wasn't really permitted for him to share food with a servant, even though he had done so here and there. He remembered how thin Merlin was, how his ribs were visible through his skin. Not that he was too thin, but he was thinner than him. He lacked muscle, he lacked any extra meat. Maybe that's why he felt Merlin shivering the night before. It was only mid-autumn, not cold enough to start shivering.

There were two strawberries left, he nearly reached for one, but drew his hand back, allowing Merlin to take one more. He left it in the bowl, Arthur suspected it was because he wanted him to have it. He suddenly had no desire for it, and simply sat beside him in silence.

Merlin refused to grab the strawberry so, almost irritated, Arthur grabbed it and placed it in his hands. Not saying anything, not looking at him as their fingers brushed together. "Thank you, sire."

The polite 'sire' bothered him, suddenly. Why should Merlin call him that when they were just friends? Suddenly his heart was racing and Merlin had lay back in the grass, staring at the sky. Arthur hesitated for a moment before laying down one more. Merlin's elbow quite nearly in his face, so he did all he could do, push Merlin's arm out of the way so he could put his hands behind his head. Instead of dropping his hands, Merlin simply rested his bent arm against his. Gently at first, then he relaxed when Arthur didn't hit him.

It was a simple little touch, but it got him chewing the inside of his lip. "I think I should return to Camelot when the sun rises." He said softly. Merlin's weight shifted, he sat up slightly to properly look at him. Arthur met his gaze, his eyes were unreadable but he pulled his brows together as though he were concerned.

"Oh?" He asked. "How come?"

"I'm sure my father will be wondering where I went. I didn't give him a proper explanation."

Merlin said nothing, lowering himself back down.

"Why do you ask?" Arthur started, voice his usual drawl, before taking on a more teasing tone by adding "Are you going to miss me?"

"Hey, I wasn't the one who came all the way out here, remember?" Merlin teased right back, whatever he had seen in his eyes was gone now, and he looked like his normal big-eared self.

"Merlin" He stated in a warning tone. He kind of liked saying his name – the way it rolled off of his tongue was easy and simple.

When the sun started to set and he began to feel Merlin shiver, he nudged him and sat up. "Let's head back." He offered, and Merlin was on his feet in a second. He almost fondly watched as he nearly stumbled on his way up.

Inside, they settled into their beds. Merlin was still shivering, it would probably frost tonight. It was going to get cold. After dealing with Merlin quietly shaking, Arthur sighed and grabbed his cloak from beside him, tossing it at the other. "You'll bring the building down with that shaking of yours" He stated, rolling to his side, facing away from him. Merlin only chuckled and thanked him.

In the morning, Merlin was still sleeping when he woke. His cloak was wrapped tightly around Merlin's thin frame, his usual blanket on top of him. He sat there for a long moment, studying Merlin's face. His hand was reaching out to touch him before he had a chance to realize what he was doing. He stopped, lips parted slightly, his fingertips oh so close to his face.

He pulled away, standing up and grabbing that shirt to hang over the window for him, smiling slightly as he left. May as well gather his things, he had a long journey ahead of him.

By the time he was ready, Merlin emerged, carrying Arthur's cloak. With a bright smile, he draped it over Arthur's shoulders. "Why don't you hold onto it?" He offered. "You'll need it more than I do when you come back."

"I have one" He stated.

"Then why didn't you grab your own last night?" He asked, voice laced with slight irritation.

"I didn't think of it."

"You didn't—" He sighed. "Of course you didn't think of it. When are you coming back?" he asked.

"I'm not sure. Uh, a little longer."

Arthur said nothing; he wanted to demand that Merlin come home with him now. But he said nothing, only wordlessly nodding.

Merlin licked his lips. "Oh, we've got some food for your trip home" He said, turning to rush back inside and gather it. When he came back, he pushed the package into Arthur's hands, he took it quietly.

"Thank you." He said, nodding his head. Merlin nodded, he was doing that thing again where he seemed almost shaky, like there was something he was trying to do, or something he wanted to do. Arthur really couldn't tell. "Well. I had best be off. Safe travels, I should see you in a few days."

"Yes, sire" Merlin stated. "I'll be seeing you." Arthur mounted his horse, and began his slow journey back to Camelot.

* * *

"Why are you still here, Merlin?" His mother asked him, "I thought you were going back with him."

"Oh, no, I uh, I was going to stay here a little longer."

Fondly, she stroked his hair. "I'll be fine. Go with him, I know you want to. You told me about Balinor. And you got to meet your father. You're needed elsewhere; If you hurry you might be able to catch up to him." She smiled and kissed his forehead.

Merlin smiled, pulling his mother into his arms. "Thank you." He said.

"He needs you."

Merlin turned, gathering a small handful of things before giving his mother one final good-bye, then taking off in the same direction that Arthur had gone. He would catch up to him in no time.


	3. III

Final chapter, enjoy~ The lyrics came from three songs by Loreena Mckennit, I figure I should probably label the song titles. In order: "Full Circle", "The Mystic's Dream", and finally "The Old Ways". Watch for the sequel, it will be coming soon. I've had a really really really awful week, so I've been super unhappy lately. Reviews will brighten this sad writer's day? Thanks for reading

* * *

_turning to go, as you call out my name.__  
__like a bird in a cage, spreading its __wings to fly.__  
__'the old ways are lost', you sang as you flew__  
__and I wondered why._

Nothing interesting happened. He was part way home, about to stop for the night. As he was relaxing behind a small fire, he heard the hoof prints of someone approaching, and stood quickly. His sword was in his hands and he got ready.

Instead of a bandit or a creature, it was just Merlin.

He bit his tongue until he tasted blood. Forcing away that smile that threatened to appear was more important than anything else right now. "So you did miss me" He stated smugly. "I knew it."

Merlin rolled his eyes. "I figured that after this trip, you'll need someone to polish your armour and dress you. It's not like you can do that yourself, right?" He teased right back, only to earn a swift punch to the shoulder.

"Gather some more wood, the fire's running low." And here it was, back to their usual status. But something felt different as Merlin sluggishly walked away. He sat down once more on the patch of rock he had uncovered for the fire, and waited.

Merlin didn't take that long, thankfully. He had started to grow bored once more, yet he didn't bother greeting Merlin when he game back, a slightly impressive armful of wood deposited by the fire. "Merlin, how were you able to gather so much in such a small amount of time." He asked calmly.

"Oh, well, I just found it lying around. Must have been from another camp or something."

He frowned, well, that worked he supposed. But there was still something nagging him, something in the back of his mind that told him something was amiss. "Right. Well come on then, there's still a bit of food left, can't have you die on me."

"Yeah, you still need me to dress you." Arthur flung a twig at him as Merlin chuckled.

They settled side by side once more, "Merlin.. did you, by any chance, remember to bring something to sleep on?" He asked slowly.

"Oh, uh." Merlin threaded his fingers through his hair, scratching a section briefly. "I didn't, no. I was kinda in a hurry."

Arthur sighed softly, placing his palm against his forehead. "Merlin, what am I going to do with you?"

"Pay me?" Merlin asked hopefully. A light punch to his arm, Merlin staggered where he sat, chuckling cheerfully.

"Shut up" Arthur commanded, Merlin just sat there smiling.

At some point, Arthur rolled out the bed and lay back, adjusting himself so that he was near to the fire. "Here" He stated, tossing his blankets towards his servant. Merlin blinked stupidly.

"A-are you sure, sire?"

"Take them before I change my mind."

Merlin's expression softened, "Thank you."

Arthur said nothing as he rolled to his side, pulling his cloak over him to keep him warm. All at once the smell of his cloak overpowered him, quite nearly making him dizzy. All he could breathe was Merlin. It was a dusty and foreign smell. He couldn't place the scent, and he certainly couldn't pull it away from him. Merlin settled beside him, he could hear him squirming around until he relaxed. Arthur closed his eyes, his heart racing in his ears.

This time, he couldn't sleep for entirely different reasons. Reasons related entirely to the warm form lying next to him, just far enough away to be untouchable, but close enough to be pulled over if he wanted. Of course, there wasn't anything he wanted to do, other than sleep. He chewed his tongue, concentrating on the fire in front of him, shoving his cloak down enough so that he would stop breathing in that smell.

When he woke up, Merlin was bundled up in his blankets, looking far too comfortable for his own good. Arthur was cold, the fire had gone out, and the thin cloak did nothing to keep him warm. He was considering grabbing one of the many blankets off of the other and using it for himself. But then he would have to deal with that scent, the smell that kept him awake, lost in muddy thoughts of suspicions and other things he really didn't want to think about.

Eventually, he was still cold. It was still too early, Merlin was still sleeping as if he didn't care about anything but himself. Grumbling under his breath, Arthur grasped the top blanket and tugged it over to him, wrapping himself in it. It was beautifully warm, having been kept heated by a person all night. Merlin grumbled something under his breath, something that sounded close to an insult. Arthur smiled to himself, the new sheet smelled a bit less like Merlin and a bit more like things sheets should smell like.

Merlin woke up before he did, so when he finally woke up, there was a bright fire burning and all of the blankets had been tossed over top of him. Merlin was sitting there, staring into the flames. "Ready to go, sleepy head?" He chirped brightly. How could he be so insufferable all the time? And how could he find himself driven half mad by thoughts of him?

Merlin had somehow become an impossibly large part of his life.

Arthur led the way back to Camelot, still distracted, still lost in thought. He didn't respond to most of what Merlin said, even though he had been babbling on about whatever came to mind.

Merlin, realizing that he wasn't getting anywhere, eventually shut himself up. It was something Arthur almost felt bad about, that is, until they made their way through the streets. He was finally home, and the two of them could return to their normal lives.

Their normal lives, of course, meant Merlin taking care of pretty much any little thing he could think of. Though he didn't really tell him to do anything, Merlin did it himself.

He was partly grateful for it, and on the other hand, he almost wanted Merlin around more. He wanted him to be at his side, which was insane. He had feelings for Gwen, didn't he?

As soon as he saw her, her beautiful shy smiles, her raven hair, her pretty eyes – he realized that something had seriously changed. He felt nothing for the girl he had once longed to be with. He awkwardly shuffled away from her, not sure what to do. He ran his fingers through his hair as Merlin returned to his chambers, a bundle of clothing in his arms. His heart raced as he got to work on putting them away.

"Sire?"

Arthur snapped himself out of it, straightening. "Make sure the folds are in the right places, last time you were dreadful." He commanded, Merlin nodded, getting back to work. His back was turned to him, and Arthur dragged his eyes across the curve of his neck, the way his ears stuck out from his head, that little bit of hair sticking straight up at the top of his head. How could one person look so constantly messy?

This was getting to be too much for him. His skin felt hot. "I'm going for a ride." He declared, standing abruptly.

"Do you need me to get anything?" Merlin asked gently, turning those large eyes towards him.

"No. I can do it myself." Arthur didn't look at Merlin as he left, heading to the stables and gathering a horse. Riding into the woods as fast as the animal could take him. He needed the fresh air, he needed to be away from Merlin.

But this had all started because he didn't want to be without Merlin.

None of this made any sense to him – he didn't know how to react to it. The cloak that still smelled faintly of his servant, somehow he hadn't asked him to wash it yet. It was starting to become an obsession; it was beginning to get under his skin.

When he got back, Merlin was asleep in one of the chairs, his cheek resting against his fist. Arthur went about his business as usual, not giving too much care to the sleeping servant, who jumped, startled, at Arthur's arrival.

He looked panicked. "I'm sorry! I didn't mean to, I just thought you'd be back soon, so I was going to wait for you then I guess I just.."

"Fell asleep"

"Yeah.."

Merlin at least had the decency to look ashamed.

* * *

There was to be an execution. A woman had been found using magic, she had been out for a stroll, a man had tried to take any valuables from her, he had pulled a sword and she had used magic to defend herself. The thought made Merlin sick to his stomach. Had she wronged someone? No, she had been defending her life. Arthur paced through his room, even Merlin looked a bit paler than usual. Their eyes locked for a moment, and maybe he thought he understood. That look in his eyes – they felt the same about this. They both knew that Merlin wouldn't be here because of magic, they both knew that this wasn't right. They also knew that there was nothing either of them could do about it.

He sucked in a deep breath as the two of them went into the courtyard. Uther stood in front of everyone, his eyes hard, he gave his usual speech. The black cloaked man held the axe. Merlin stood half behind him, the crowd pushed them close together, it made him sick that some people would cheer. This wasn't right. He felt Merlin wince when the axe went down, his head bowed, nearly pressed against his shoulder. Arthur remained quiet, and slid his hand to Merlin's shoulder, guiding him away before he could see the look of glory in his father's eyes.

In silence, they returned to Arthur's chambers. Merlin scampered off to gather something to eat, he stood against the window, leaning against the frame and staring at the commotion outside. Merlin returned, still looking unhappy.

"It's unfair, isn't it?" Arthur breathed, Merlin strode closer to him.

"I knew her" Merlin eventually choked out. He breathed shakily, his eyes focused on the window and nothing more. "She was a good person" His voice shook. "She didn't deserve this. She—"

Arthur simply laid his arm across the slightly taller boy's shoulder, "I know".

He breathed deeply, "Magic has been used against us countless times. I can see where he comes from. But." He stopped, just staring. "Is every use of it a crime?"

Merlin said nothing, he was upset. He was shaking under his arm. His jaw trembled as he clenched his teeth, he could see the fury mingling with the hurt.

"Eat." Arthur commanded, lightly nudging Merlin towards the food he had brought in. The servant shook his head. Arthur led him to the table, forcing him to sit. Forcing some of the food towards him with a quiet "You're too thin, I saw, you need to eat more. I can't have you collapsing on me."

Reluctantly, Merlin ate. Just a little bit, but it was better than nothing.

There was still something nagging at him, Merlin made to leave and, with his hand on the door, Arthur called his name.

"Yes, sire?"

"Merlin, if-" He broke off "If there's anything you need to tell me. Anything at all." He left it at that, Merlin shook his head quickly.

"No sire, there's nothing."

Arthur nodded, Merlin departed, he returned to his spot by the window.

Merlin woke him up in the morning, apparently back to his usual self. But his expression was lacking the usual mirth it contained. He didn't seem entirely happy, but Arthur shared that feeling.

They went about their usual activities. Nothing worthwhile happened. Arthur lost no sleep for the next few nights. Having Merlin around calmed him, even if half the time his heart raced.

They were going hunting again. This time a few other knights joined them. Merlin bumbled around as usual, it was a simple overnight trip, it wasn't supposed to be this hard for Merlin to prepare. But apparently, that's how it happened.

They set off into the woods, little words were spoken, and once they arrived at their destination, they set up camp. Once that was done, they split into groups, a bit of a challenge to see who could bring back the largest kill. Merlin was his usual self, apparently no longer distressed about the woman from last week.

Spending time with Merlin outside was always somewhat enjoyable. Merlin was on his toes, for once, though he couldn't explain why. He wasn't usually this alert. They weren't really tracking anything, not yet, just conversing on their way through the woods. He missed their time in Ealdor, back when he wasn't so concerned about what this thing rumbling through his blood was. Obviously the cause was Merlin, the same irritating rumbling held the desire to keep Merlin close.

Why?

He didn't want the answer. Not right now, and not any time soon. The winter was coming quickly, and Arthur wondered vaguely if Merlin had brought enough clothes to keep warm overnight. He also wondered if Merlin even had anything warm to wear. He supposed he could spare a few. His servant's thoughts were focused more on Arthur than himself. He was foolish.

They kept walking, but there was nothing in the area. At least, nothing until Arthur spotted a piercing ebony feather among the leaves. His eyes widened, he grasped Merlin's hand and began dragging him in the opposite direction. "What's going on?" Merlin called as they ran.

"The same thing that attacked you near Ealdor" Arthur returned, pulling Merlin along as fast as he could.

Arthur stopped, Merlin paused to catch his breath. Arthur kept a firm grip on Merlin's hand, ready to pull him away. He wasn't going to let either of them get hit again, there was no one magical around here who could help. His heartbeat thudded in his ear from the rush and fear (not that he would admit it) of running.

There were two of them. They lurked in the shadows, one of them emerged, eyeing Arthur's sword carefully. The other went around to the other side of them, "Whatever you do" Arthur started slowly "Don't you dare get hurt."

They both launched themselves at the same time, Arthur barely had time to react, Merlin clumsily waving his sword at the Kleeia. Merlin didn't wear armour, he was good at staying out of the way. But not this time, this time Merlin was a target.

Arthur killed one as it made for Merlin's back. The other sunk its claws deeply into Arthur's arm. The pain was intense; his breath was knocked completely out of him. The next thing he knew, he was on the ground and Merlin was kneeling over him, peeling back the chainmail to look at his arm.

Their eyes met, Merlin's hair was damp with sweat, worry was etched into his features. "We don't have time" Arthur growled. "We need to warn the others. They have to know what's out here."

Merlin's eyes were moist, "There isn't a sorcerer around, Merlin." The reality of the situation hit him, there was nothing he could do. He was going to bleed out and for a moment, panic bit at his lungs. He rest his head back on the leaves, Merlin was shaking his head, his eyes were fogged and he kept glancing around them. He closed his eyes, fighting back the true fear that gripped him. The cuts were large, he could feel the blood running down his arm. There's no way he would be able to get back to Camelot, let alone find someone who could help him.

"Arthur, please. We can get you back in time, there has to be someone." He said in a hushed voice.

Arthur shook his head, "No, Merlin. There isn't enough time. It's more important that we warn everyone. These creatures will kill us all if we're not careful."

"I can't let you die! Get up, we have to go!"

"Merlin, hush." He said calmly, trying not to think about what death was going to feel like. Or what his father was going to think. Or what Merlin was going to do without him. He brought up one hand, the one that was still seeping blood, and pressed it to the back of Merlin's neck. The man bowed his head towards him, trying to stifle a sob.

"I'm sorry I couldn't protect you." Merlin choked out, his cheeks wet. "Arthur, please, we have to move."

"I've already told you. I'm staying here. I'd rather" Arthur hesitated "die here." He had come to terms with the fact that he was going to die one day. He had not expected it to be today, or so early in his life. He had already made the choice once to die, for Merlin's sake. "Warn everyone." His voice was quiet. "And stop crying, you look foolish"

A half-hearted smile touched Merlin's face, "I'm not leaving you. I'll stay by your side. I'll carry you back." The devotion in his voice struck him, he sat up slightly, his hand still on Merlin's neck.

The rumbling was roaring in his ears, the blood was leaking down Merlin's shoulder. "Merlin, shut up." He said softly. They were close, he could smell his hair, he could feel the way he trembled.

Arthur kissed him.

His mouth was salty, and Merlin's hands grabbed his collar forcefully, one palm pressing hard against his face. As if he never wanted him to let go, even though he knew he would have to soon. He could feel himself becoming weaker, his vision was weak, the kiss ended and Merlin's shaky breath fanned across his jaw. Their foreheads were together, Merlin leaned forwards, pushing Arthur to the ground. He felt dizzy, the cut was bleeding out, and Merlin kissed him again. Here he was, dying out in the woods, and he was kissing Merlin. There was no other way he would have wanted to go, now that it came down to it. He almost wished he would have noticed exactly what it had been long ago, before it ended up being too late. So maybe he could have enjoyed this.

This had been what had rushing through him for so long. Merlin had somehow crawled under his skin, he had sunk into his very core and made a home for himself. It had only taken him three days to find him, three days for him to unknowingly realize that he needed him more than he needed air.

His strength left him.

* * *

Merlin felt like collapsing.

There were times he had told himself he was going to tell Arthur about him. Back when they first went to Ealdor, for one. There were times that he knew he had been found out, times he thought that he was going to be in trouble. Arthur had never noticed, maybe he was too thick to figure it out.

He knew Arthur's views had changed; his own life had been saved by a sorcerer. But would that be enough for the Prince to forgive him? He had known as soon as the blood rushed from Arthur's arm that he was going to have to use magic. He had used it to destroy to Kleeia, and had been at Arthur's side.

The thought of revealing himself to him was terrifying. He couldn't stop his hands from shaking, and he hadn't been able to think clearly. Arthur was his world. When he had shown up in Ealdor, his heart had raced. One, because Arthur nearly caught him boiling water with a spell, and two, because _Arthur was there._

He was still kissing him when Arthur's arm went slack. When he broke away he watched his eyes slip closed. "Arthur" He called, his voice cracked down the centre. "Arthur!" His hands on his chest, trying to shake the life into him. "Arthur!" Nothing. No reply, he pressed his head to the other's chest, listening for that weak heartbeat.

Merlin had to wait until the last second, but as soon as Arthur stopped responding, Merlin panicked. He couldn't wait, he couldn't let Arthur die.

"I-if you can hear me" Merlin muttered through his shaky breath. "I can't wait any longer. Please don't listen to what I'm about to say, please _please_ don't think any different of me."

Merlin had heard muffled voices, snatches of conversation, Arthur might hear it too. But he couldn't wait, he had clung to the possibility of taking Arthur somewhere else so he wouldn't have to take this risk. Arthur had prepared himself to die, why would he do it do soon? Why would he just give in? Couldn't he at least _try_?

He took a deep breath and tried to call onto the words he had only heard once, pulling Arthur's arm to his stomach, exposing the gruesome wound. He couldn't wait, he _needed_ Arthur, and he needed him to survive in more ways than one.

He began to speak, trying to steady his voice, speaking as lowly as he possibly could. The wound smoked, which alarmed him, causing him to curse and pull his hands back. But it was beginning to close. Merlin breathed, he had to relax. Arthur would be fine.

Exhaling again, Merlin returned his hands over Arthur's arm and continued speaking. His eyes flashed gold, the wound very slowly began to close, a thin curl of smoke rising from the flesh as the skin stitched back together.

When it was done, Merlin nearly passed out. He wavered, his forehead meeting Arthur's chest for a long moment as he just breathed.

The Prince was still alive, and Merlin could now be facing his own death. He used his sleeves to wipe his face, sniffing as he sat beside him, watching his now sleeping form carefully.

A million things were running through his head, most of them ended with him getting his head chopped off, the rest ended with burning and other gruesome ways to die. Would Arthur be able to forgive him? Was there even a chance, would Arthur's duty come before the law?

He had let the woman go free, but she was not Merlin. She had not been at Arthur's side this long. It was easy to forget a stranger, it was impossible to forget someone one was close to.

Merlin sat for a long time with his face pressed to his knees, trying to calm himself down. He was tired, the spell was a powerful one. At some point, he reached out to grasp Arthur's hand and found that he was ice cold. So he created a fire, lit it with a whispered word, and stripped off his coat and anything else they had with them to lay on top of Arthur. He had to keep him warm, and nurse him back to health.

For a long time, Merlin sat with Arthur's hand pulled to his knee, resting his forehead against the calloused fingers. He would give everything for Arthur to not have found out about him – but it was impossible. He would be dead if it wasn't for him.

Merlin slid Arthur's hand back under the fabric he lay under, and he shifted away from him. He had to stay away from him, at least until he woke up. A part of him wanted to flee right now, but there could be more of those creatures in these woods, he couldn't risk leaving him behind. Merlin was, predictably, a mess.

When Arthur began to stir, Merlin held his breath and stared at his feet, his knees still pulled to his chest. Trying to supress the way his bones trembled. Arthur sat up, he still couldn't breathe properly. He was panicking, worrying, and absolutely terrified.

"Merlin?" Arthur stated groggily. He remained still. "Come here." It was a command that Merlin couldn't quite bring himself to obey. "Merlin. Come here" His voice was strained, but firm. This time he obeyed, sliding closer, but keeping his back to him. "Why did you wait you idiot?" He chided "My head feels like there's an arrow stuck in it."

He really didn't know how to take that. He didn't know what to do or say but Arthur's hand was warm on his shoulder. When he still didn't respond, warm arms circled him. "I knew" He breathed. Merlin's heart sunk, if Arthur had figured it out, had anyone else? Was he that transparent?

"A-Arthur, I—"

"Don't bother. I know what you're going to say." He murmured, "Thank you."

Merlin breathed again; maybe his head was going to stay on his shoulders.

"The old ways end with me" He vowed. Merlin shifted where he sat, turning to face Arthur. The male frowned "You could have at least cleaned yourself up" He stated. "You're covered in blood." Merlin couldn't help the way his expression cracked into a small smile.

"If anyone else finds out, I won't be able to protect you." A warm hand ran against his hair, their foreheads were together.

"Everything I've done has been for you" Merlin breathed, wondering if it were safe to tell Arthur just what he had done for him. "You're my world" He concluded, letting out a shaky breath.

"Don't turn into a girl on me" Arthur stated with some cocky grin on his face. Merlin couldn't quite shake the lingering strings of panic rushing through his veins, but Arthur brought Merlin closer. Maybe he could tell Merlin wasn't entirely done panicking, maybe he realized that Merlin needed just a bit more.

So he kissed him. This time without the shadow of death looming over them, it was gentle and Arthur seemed completely comfortable even while Merlin was still nervous. This was the Prince he was kissing, while Merlin was just his servant.

Later, they would deal with alerting everyone else to the creatures. Right now his hands were in Arthur's hair and he didn't feel like there was anything else he had to hide from him. Not even the way his pale cheeks flushed or that when they finally broke away he didn't want to let go.


End file.
